tHe aPpRENTIcE

Sunday, July 24, 2005

The New Season

I am starting a new season in my life. I just stepped down from working with Outbreak to take a much needed rest. You know as important as ministry is, sometimes you just need to be honest with yourself... I've realized that for a now it's more important for me to reach inward rather than outward. It's been another grueling season... Not as bad as the season before but still very uncomfortable.

I'm attempting to secure a place to stay. By that I mean trying to stay in the condominium I'm living in. My roomate has given me Hell about my cat that I brought home... but the cat is gone so you SHOOULD be fine now. That is until he finds something else to complain about... Anyways long story...

For now I will work and save some of the "Green Stuff". I look forward to taking care of the basics... my heart being one of them.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Deep & Insightful

You think anyone wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I'm wearin THESE bad boys?!?

Underline from My Utmost

The one passion of Paul’s life was to proclaim the gospel of God. He welcomed heartbreak, disillusionment, and tribulation for only one reason—these things kept him unmovable in his devotion to the gospel of God.

Monday, January 31, 2005

Any anything anyone?

Ever have one of those conversations and than there's this moment where your expected to give some type of response but you have none? The other person just waits there waiting for your opinion and you just don't have one. I mean you could say something... But than you'd just be making something up because you don't have it in you to either agree or disagree... Or have absolutely any anything. That's right you don't have an anything in your head. Just complete nothingness.

I've been on a consistent role of having these conversations. I'm not sure if I'm just tired... Or maybe if I searched myself deep enough I could come up with an opinion of some sort... It's kind of a numbing feeling to be honest. It's not that I don't care. I do... I just simply don't have any anything.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

Job interview

I just got out of a job interview with "PM". I would basically be cleaning here 15 hours a week. It was a good interview. I've always wanted to sit down and talk with him a bit. Yes, we talked about the job... But we talked more about life. About the difficulties of learning to trust God. It was different telling my story to him... because I was telling it to someone who understood exactly what I meant... and what it means for my life. He didn't just hear the words I was speaking but he understood the thought process behind everything I said... about my deepest wounds...

His words and his presence brought a great deal of comfort to me. He knew what I had been through before I finished my sentence. It was most comforting because he knows where I'm going and he has confirmed my gut feeling. I know that what I've been through has been worth the pain because he's been there...

I guess he just seemed to know that I would be ok...

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

The Apprentice

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

May the sons of God be revealed

Romans 8:19

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Tired out of the known extent of my mind

It's 5:00... ... pause ... It's the end of the day. Ever have those moments where you exert yourself so much and than look back and wonder how? Right now you are peering into the window of my life. It has been a long day... pause ... ... ... I made some phone calls today asking if would be people might be interested in being a small group leader.

REJECTED!! (said in strong bad voice)

So, there you have it. But still all is not lost. Yes, I remember what the Lord of the Rings movies said, something about hope. ...And I have that! I still have the cover on the back of my cell phone. (It has been loose for some time and has not yet fallen off)

Some days just end up spiraling downward into this deep... deep... hole and than you find the loose change you were looking for and exclaim, "that's where I put it!!" (It just took me like 30 seconds to find the exclamation point)

But seriously I have had a good week. Sunday, I got to dance with Chuckie (And I do mean cheese, not the demonic toy, doll, thing)

I watched Alias last night... Thought it was a good show but ya know I've just come to expect more from Sydney... You know I think that's enough.

Don't everyone rush to email me at once.